Zounds, can it be? Are we at the end of Abandonment Party?
Hardpan City has crashed. Hellzoo is gone. Mean, Tecker, and Hatchel are safe, but Parlay sacrificed his own magic and body to save them. As his life slips away, he regrets the changes that he put himself through in order to cope with the ordeal of his world ending. Hellzoo had forced his guilt to the surface, and Parlay now recalls who was responsible for the genocide. That person is still alive somewhere on the planet.
Parlay gives one of his remaining lockets to Darrow, and tells him to smash it. This will allow Tome to possess Parlay’s body permanently, but only after Parlay dies. Vornis argues against this idea, but Parlay knows that Tome will have a better chance at succeeding in stopping the mystery killer.
Time passes. Mean, Trisk, Darrow, Vornis, Hatchel, and Tecker meet up with Tome in his new body. They discuss Tome’s new life, and wonder about Hellzoo’s true identity. Afterwards, Mean goes to meet Dark at Cot’s Bar.
Back in Jesice, Tyle Dhaston is found by the media. The amulet he received from Parlay has saved him from the brink of death and restored his original body. As he is surrounded by a crowd cheering the wonders of magic, Tyle laments his ironic fate.
In the yard of Parlay’s old mansion, Vornis and Dring hold a funeral for him.
Dark sits with Mean as she eats dinner. This is the first time she’s eaten in front of him, and she’s worried he’d find it repulsive since Jesians don’t consume solid food. As Mean eats her pizza slices, she makes a joke about how Dark could have his eyes closed beneath his armor so he wouldn’t have to watch her. Dark decides to ease her fears, and reveal his true identity. As his helmet opens, Mean reaches over the table to stop him. She tells him not to remove his armor for such a trivial thing.
They continue to meet there for many nights afterward, and they bring life to the lonely world.
After the crash of Hardpan City, Parlay is dying.
- I can’t feel anything; the pain is gone now. After such a long time, I’ve rid myself of it. Hellzoo––the intruder. I’m glad it came when it did. I can die as myself.
- Kim – What do the “it”s mean here? Really confused about this section. No idea who’s talking (Parlay) or what he’s talking about.
I can’t remember, either! Maybe Parlay’s just glad you’re finally done editing my novel, Kim. Just think: no more semicolons, halls, or vague sentence subjects! You’re done! At last! The pain is gone now!
But seriously, I’ll work on clarifying this little monologue. As soon as I recall what exactly Parlay is referring to. -_-
Parlay tells Darrow to take his necklace.
- Parlay stirred, raising his eyes to Darrow’s face. “There’s still one more,” he coughed. “Take my necklace.”
- Kim – Wait, thought he had two necklaces left? Where did the other one go? A mystery or mistake?
Yeah, this line is left over as a mistake. In an earlier draft I had Mean knock away one of Parlay’s necklaces. In this final draft she sends away the remote control instead. So there SHOULD be two necklaces here. One is the dormant Slate virus, and the other is the pattern of Parlay’s body. He backs up his pattern every day.
Which reminds me: In these uncertain times, you need a failsafe against thieves and hackers—you need LifeLock™. Protect your laptop, computer, even your TV! This final chapter of Abandonment Party is brought to you by Norton.
No, I’m just kidding, ha,ha. I hate those ads.
Kim wrote a comment and attached it to this line break for some reason.
- Kim – Where were Dring and Trisk in this section? Was Trisk still knocked out in the car? Didn’t Dring and Dark leave together? And what about Tyle? No one asks about him? Is he dead or what?
Trisk is the only one that would care about Tyle right now, and yeah: she’s still in the car. But with my current revisions Dring will be added to this scene. I don’t think I’ll have him do much since his grieving moment is during the funeral, but I can have him worry about Tyle.
Kim didn’t mention Mackaba so I guess it’s fine if none of the characters wonder what happened to him, ha,ha.
Vornis tells Trisk what happened to Tyle Dhaston after she lost consciousness.
- “So I went down and fought that guy with the weird machines. One of them backfired––killed him I think.”
- Kim – Geez, says it so casually.
Remember that Vornis doesn’t know anything about Trisk’s past or present relationship with Tyle. He doesn’t know she cares for him! Vornis DID relate to Tyle during the fight, but is it enough for him to sugar-coat what happened? Cast your votes in the comments!
COME ON GUYS. It’s the last chapter! Vote on something! Matt has voted before, but a vote doesn’t count if it’s only ONE PERSON. KIM. Or, uh, any of my millions of fans? You guys want to chime in some time?
Darrow forgot to tell Trisk everything that happened with Hellzoo—I guess he got caught up at some point—so now the job falls to Mean.
- “I want you to meet my dad––and that’s Lord Ley Tecker––and Darrow didn’t tell you anything that happened, did he?”
- Kim – He didn’t really get a chance to. Maybe the scene could start after he explained everything to her? So it doesn’t feel like anything is getting repeated to the reader and all the characters are caught up? But maybe keep the part where they explain what happened to Tyle since that’s still up in the air. Edit: Oh, Tyle survived on his own? Maybe say something about how they went back for him, but he was gone?
Yeah, starting the scene after Darrow caught Trisk up is a good idea. And since Dark and Dring will pass by the Dhaston building’s lobby in my revision, I can have them mention that Tyle was missing. Good thinking, Kim. It would be easy for you to slack off now the there are mere PAGES left in the book. Not that I would EVER slack off like that while editing one of YOUR drafts….
And I’ll admit that I forgot most of this section even happened. I only remember the scene with Mean and her friends sitting at the table with Tecker and Hatchel while talking about Hellzoo. I think I’ll just cut out the bloat and skip to Mean’s arrival.
Tecker talks about Hellzoo, and how they all saw another place beyond the hall’s portal.
- “But what was that?” he asked. “And what was that bizarre place we saw? There’s no other planet in our system with clouds like that. Not on Jesice or on this one or anywhere. Where does something like that come from?”
- Kim – Wait, what did they see? Thought there was just a beam of light? Oh, the clouds was another place? That wasn’t clear before. Thought that was just all of the clouds that had gotten sucked in throughout the day, and now magic had made them colorful.
Don’t worry, Kim! I did, indeed, clarify the cloudy place last chapter. (Arsiling.) Because I had a feeling you’d accidentally think that all the clouds had gotten sucked into the portal and transformed into magical cotton candy on the other side. 🙄
Back on Jesice, near the hex door, crowds are gathering to gawk at the destruction to the cliff-side city.
- Individuals in the crowd would stare at the far-off scene, while others hurried between makeshift tents and emergency vehicles parked at the road.
- Kim – Does this mean it’s far away? Or really unusual?
Kim’s comment is pointing at the word ‘far-off.’ Can ‘far-off’ mean ‘unusual?’ Like FAR OUT does? The only definition I can find for ‘far-off’ is ‘distant; remote.’ I kind of want to change it to ‘far-out’ now. “Whoa, check out those gnarly chains. Far out!”
I should make a new character just to say that line. He’ll be one of the medical assistants: a hippie that took the job for the extra ‘perks’ if ya know what I mean. 🥴
And yes, after twenty-six chapters I finally found the WordPress emoji button. You right-click and it’s the first option there.
Vornis and Dring gather up Parlay’s effects and place them in a coffin.
- Tattered clothing lay inside the cushioned interior of the casket, and Vornis placed a severed, gold chain on top of the pile. Thick clouds rumbled and churned in the grey sky above.
- Kim – Slightly cliché for a funeral.
The dark clouds? Oh, I wasn’t even thinking about that. In the ominous epilogue that sets up the next book there’s a thunderstorm over the ruins of Hardpan City. So I needed the storm clouds to be passing over Parlay’s mansion, since it’s west of there.
Or are you also going to tell me that a thunderstorm during the ‘antagonist lies defeated in the ruins’ scene is cliché as well!? 🤨
Hm. Maybe I SHOULD change the funeral weather. As far as the timeline is concerned, Mackaba’s epilogue happens shortly after Hardpan falls. I don’t think Parlay’s funeral would be in between those events after all. So… the funeral weather will be post-shower Spring sunshine! Yay! Parlay’s dead!
Vornis can’t bear to look at the coffin.
- The beast lowered his gaze to the decaying leaves at his feet.
- Kim – Are these the same leaves from the cage?
You think the leaves in THIS scene are from the cage fight? Or just leaves from a different dream lily? Parlay only kept those plants inside his mansion and necklaces. The leaves outside are all from dead trees.
Oh dear. Not much of the chapter left. We’re really ending this blog series off with a thrill, aren’t we? 😴
Mean meets Dark at Cot’s Bar. Hm, did I call it ‘Cot’s Bar’ in the narrative yet?
- Mean held a slice of pizza up to her mouth, chewing at the crust.
- Kim – Pizza and chewed at the crust? Sounds a little odd though, like she nibbling like a mouse or something.
You’re right; that’s weak. Mean still isn’t comfortable eating around Jesians like Dark, so I really need to drive that point home. She should take a bite, then a long strand of cheese starts to slip between her mouth and the pizza. Then Mean struggles to eat up the cheese before it falls, all while getting embarrassed because Dark is watching her. Perfect.
Yep. Pizza eating. That’s what we’re finishing on.
After Dark and Mean have their moment, they play video games.
- And the two played through the night, meeting there many times after that. Mean worked her way through the restaurant’s menu, and Dark talked with her in between attempts to conquer the game’s high score. Every evening the games would light up, and the place would fill with buzzes and music––but only when those two arrived, did they bring life to the dead world once again.
- Kim – Sweet ending!
Oh man. THIS is how my blog series ends!? I thought Kim would have a huge problem with something in this scene and we could finish with an epic argument. But we’re capping everything off with the do’s and don’ts of eating PIZZA CRUST.
I suppose I should just take the compliment. Thank you, Kim! 😅
See you in the next book, then!
WAIT. There’s still an epilogue. I haven’t looked at Kim’s edits yet, but I’m sure there’s something amazing there that we can end on! See you next time! 😎
I vote no sugar coating. Vornis doesn’t sugar coat!
I took out the line for now. Kim wanted sugar, and you didn’t. Who breaks the tie?