Warcraft and Abandonment Party 3: Chapter 29 (First Draft)

First Draft

 

Looks like the first draft of Abandonment Party 3 is done! You know what that means! Time to talk about Warcraft! That’s “Warcraft” the 2016 film–and like my books it also takes years of delays to see the light of day. So let’s discuss it! Or just watch me discuss it with myself!

Spoilers Continue reading

Monsters from Nowhere and Abandonment Party 3: Chapter 28

First Draft

Today I want to talk about something that can happen at the end of a story. Well, it mostly happens at the end of video game stories. It might have happened to you: the final stage has been conquered! The antagonist that you’ve been chasing for days has been defeated! But zounds–what’s this!? A new foe has appeared! Some giant creature that no one ever expected! Some horror that wasn’t even hinted at before or ever explained!

Over at TV Tropes it’s called “Diabolus ex Nihilo.” Or “Giant Space Flea from Nowhere” if you’re talking about a video game.

So let me give you an example from a video game. Of course. Like I’d read a book. Here come spoilers for Final Fantasy IX. (Now out on Steam. Dang, I should have put it on my birthday list.)

Spoilers Continue reading

The Force Awakens and Abandonment Party 3: Chapter 26 (First Draft)

First Draft

In this case “the force” is my next awesome chapter. True, the entire world was worried that I had lost the will to write it. My friend Matt even asked me if I had something called “writer’s block.” How silly! Not only did I have Christmas to deal with, but my brother got into a bit of an accident. He NEEDED me to be there for him these past couple of months, and family–family always comes first.

It had NOTHING to do with me getting Xenoblade Chronicles X, Tales of Zesteria, Yoshi’s Wooly World, and a new Gameboy.

It MIGHT have had a little to do with getting Fallout 4 though.

Wait, wait, first I DO need to say something about The Force Awakens. Earlier last year I made a post about it, and how it seemed as though the seventh film would be just a repeat of the originals. I HAD NO IDEA it would really be EXACTLY like the first movie. This is the world I live in, future historians: Where the masses CRAVE the same story to be told over and over! I mean, why even put up a “Spoilers” tag if I want to discuss this movie!? You’ve seen it, one way or another! Woo! I’d go over all the similarities but in this case it would be way faster to just tell you what managed to be different:

  • The new Death star got the spread gun power-up from Contra and fires three shots.
  • One stormtrooper finally realizes that his gun always misses, tosses it down, and beats up someone while using a lightsaber-deflecting baton.
  • A different stormtrooper realizes that he is a bad guy and decides to be one of the story’s protagonists instead.
  • The new droid in this movie, BB-8, uses a Dhaston orb as its main method of locomotion. Congratulations, Tyle: at some point your dad’s company will be selling self-balancing roller balls to galactic robotics manufacturers!

But the rest was the same! Can you imagine? Anyway, I did get to see one great film this winter. That’s right:

DragonballRF

My brother got it for me. He also wrote all over it. But who cares!? Frieza has been resurrected with the dragon balls! Goku must face him once more! CAN he overcome his might!? The wicked space tyrant has powered up a bit since the last cosmic battle, but you know our favorite Saiyan has been honing his skills as well!

And now that I’m talking about MY favorite series it’s totally okay for a movie to recycle the same villain, hero, plot devices, characters, and ending!

Chapter twenty-six, begin! Continue reading

Inspirational Writing Music and Abandonment Party 3: Chapter 25 (First Draft)

First Draft

 

Things don’t always go as planned during the first draft. Mackaba, the lovable criminal that was supposed to stay out of these chapters, has decided to step up and interfere with what I–the almighty author–had in store. This has lead to a confrontation: Both in the story and with me.

Well, sort of. You know I use music to motivate my writing: it’s all set up ahead of time on iTunes. It’s all in a list, in an order that matches the outline of events that I keep in my brain.

But the new Mackaba event in this chapter is not on the list! What shall I do!? Write without music? I suppose I could. But why do that when I can waste time poking around on the internet instead? It’s justified. So that’s what I did; I drove all the way to the record store to see what the great contemporary artists of the world have to offer.

Ha,ha,ha of course I didn’t do that. I played some pretty amazing video games this year, so let’s head over to YouTube and find the best CLIMACTIC music from all of them!

And if you’re at work right now–all the better! Just play these songs and stare at your computer screen with burning intensity. Type really fast too and your boss will assume you’re getting stuff done since such worthy tunes are playing. You’ll probably get a raise. No need to thank me.

Continue reading

Super Post 100 and Abandonment Party 3: Chapter 24 (First Draft)

First Draft

Wow it’s my one hundredth post! I wasn’t going to say anything but then I remembered that’s what blogs are for. I’ll try to keep this humble, though.

First, I want to thank my billions of fans. You guys–gosh, I’m tearing up–you guys really get me. You understand! You know that I’m the kind of person that doesn’t like to feel pressured. That’s why you never bombard me with messages down in the comments! Or speak to me at all! And you know I’m a frugal guy, too; that’s why you all enjoy my work without paying me much money!

Thank you! As a reward for your understanding I made another fake Hearthstone card. This one is Parlay:

 

ParlayCard2

 

Once again I forgot to write down where the picture was from but man–I can’t believe there’s a real guy out there with hair THAT poofy. He even looks all bitter and calculating.

The effect I came up with even reflects his body’s static nature. I made it paladin since it would seem most useful there. You could cast Equality and then bump the health back up to five. Not to mention all the damage from minion attacks you could just undo. The downside is that any buffs like Blessing of Kings would be erased as well.

Speaking of things that are probably just going to be erased: let’s continue with the story! Continue reading

Abandonment Party 3: Chapter 20 (First Draft)

First Draft

As I was typing through this chapter I realized something: I might need more characters in this book! Usually I want to get rid of them, right? I’m always thinking “Oh there are too many people here. I’ll chop a few and just combine their traits into another character.”

But I’m not sure if I can do that this time––not without adding more people to take their place. There are events happening that no current character can comment on! Feelings that nobody established can express! What are these powerful emotions? Well read the chapter and I’ll explain afterward. With pictures, don’t worry. There will be at least two for the “graphic-lovers.” Continue reading

Abandonment Party 3: Chapter 17 (First Draft)

IMG_1170

Now this one is a long chapter. And not because of some epic, singular, event–no; it’s because there are still so many groups of characters out there! What do I do with them? How do I make them all work for the story? First draft isn’t the time to figure that out! I just have to shove it all in.

And after all this there are STILL characters that aren’t where they need to be. Now is this a problem? No. I’ll figure out the correct pacing the next time around. It will be super-fun. I can cut characters; I can ‘consolidate’ events. But for now––enjoy! It may be a disorganized mess, but it’s still entertaining! Right, Pascal from Tales of Graces?

PascalBlargh

Continue reading

Abandonment Party 3: Chapter 15 (First Draft)

IMG_1170

Curses! I can’t think of an intro again. What am I supposed to put here!?

I do have a fascinating list of fictional teleportation devices, but that goes AFTER the chapter.

I suppose I could answer mail from my millions of fans––but I can’t find any letters! What’s wrong with you guys!? Are you intimidated by my “e-presence?” Is it because I forgot to put my address up on the site? Is it because you only exist in my imagination?

That’s it! Imagination! That gives me an amazing idea! I’ll try to put this plan into action the next time I post.
Continue reading

Abandonment Party 3: Chapter 12 (First Draft)

IMG_1170

Happy Halloween, to whomever discovers this blog! Did you take a wrong turn on the internet, traveler? Were you looking for some innocent fun? Ha! How unfortunate for you; this sloppy first draft that you have discovered is a nightmare chapter of no repose!

COWER! As two hideous monsters battle each other to the death!

TREMBLE! As awkward exposition doesn’t really explain anything!

PEE YOUR PANTS! When I don’t end the chapter on the one cool line uttered!

THEN CLAW OUT YOUR OWN EYEBALLS as everything drags on with pointless dialog!

Oh, is that not enough to scare you? Well listen to this:

I had a cyst surgically removed last week! FROM MY BUTTOCKS! BWA, HA, HA, HA, HA! Pics after the break. Continue reading

Abandonment Party 3: Chapter 10 (First Draft)

IMG_1170

As I get further in this story I’m realizing that I enjoy having more characters around. In the first book I had––what? Nine characters that were the main focus? And Vornis didn’t show up until the end. Back then if I wanted something to happen I had to make it work with just those few.

But now–! Look at this! I have many more characters to use! So many possibilities! Take this chapter for example: I’m having someone familiar show up just to see what happens! And also because I was going to put him in earlier but forgot, ha,ha.

This is why I’ll never understand those stories where half the characters die. Don’t those writers like having options? You can always make a character leave if they aren’t working out. “Put him on a bus” as those trope guys like to say. Or in Tyle’s case he actually came back on a bus.

That reminds me: I really should make a “cast of characters” page or something. Don’t let me forget to do that, Matt. Continue reading