Kim Roasts Abandonment Party: Chapter 23

Three chapters remain, plus the epilogue. Let’s do this.


Tecker and Hatchel see the hall in the sky that Error made. They call for the lord ley express jet so they can fly up and close the portal between worlds.

Mean and Parlay battle inside the cage as it flies away from Hardpan and towards the hall. Parlay reveals an amulet that houses vein, a magic-nullifying organism. The gelatinous substance reacts to his command: forming pillars, crossbows, and sharp projectiles. Mean busts out a hidden talent of her own and flies around the cage to dodge Parlay’s attacks. If she can damage him enough, his static magic will fail; but she can’t let him directly touch her or she’ll be at his mercy.

The chapter ends with Mean ensnared in a vein web and Parlay’s hand around her throat.

Will this be enough to impress Kim? I think you already know the answer to that…. Continue reading

Kim Roasts Abandonment Party: Chapter 22

Another solid chapter critique by Kim. However, she was a bit upset with me over last week’s post. You see, she felt that I left out TOO many of her hilarious margin edits because I spent all that blog space talking about Piccolo.

So this week I’ll make more room for Kim’s hilarious gags! I’ll just toss out this ‘Justification of Frieza’ essay. It took me five minutes to write. -_-

Summary: Mean and Dark reach the top floor of the Dhaston building. Dring comes running down from the roof. He tells them that Parlay is sending the city of Hardpan crashing into Jesice. Mean calms him down and tells him to escape with Dark.

After Dark and Dring leave through a hex door, Mean finds Parlay on the roof. She confronts him inside a large cage, and the entire thing blasts off from the roof toward the hall above.

Parlay explains how he’s going to saturate Jesice with magical energy. Then he will release the Slate virus, which will be programmed to inflict a ‘static’ effect. He will create a world of people that never change, never get hurt, and never die. And Hardpan city will fall on them, so they KNOW they’re saved.

Mean is reminded of the story of how Pinada saved Overland from a comet. She realizes that Parlay is trying to re-create the same favorable circumstances that made Pinada a hero. Continue reading